Speed dating

On reflection, we decided to have just one wedding after all and we have set the date! Following extensive discussions ("What about July? I know we said September but frankly I'd rather just get it over with so I can stop worrying about how much napkins cost" "OK"), we have decided to have our wedding on Saturday 24th July 2010.

"That will be fine," I thought. "Seven months is plenty of time to organise what is basically a big stupid ****ing party."

Then I started telling people we are getting married in July. People who have never been married go, "Cool." People who have been married go, "WHAT??"

Then they say things like, "Well, you have a lot to do," or "Gosh, you have a big challenge there," or "Are you ****ing inSANE?"

Then I think they see the terror in my eyes because they say, "Ha ha don't worry, it will be fine, ha ha."

I know they are trying to make me feel better. The only way they could actually make me feel better is by saying, "Ha ha don't worry, I took the precaution of booking a venue, florist, car and photographer for you some years ago, and I know a professional caterer who will do all the food for free, and I have trained a team of singing mice to make your dress." No one ever says this.

Still. July 24th is an AUSPICIOUS DAY, judging by my extensive research on Wikipedia. It is of course the day slavery was abolished in Chile (1823), the World Chess Federation was founded in Paris (1924) and 48 people were killed in a fire at a home for the elderly in Pittsburgh, Pennysylvania (1931).

It is also the birthday of Alexandre Dumas, Robert Graves and Luke Mitchell ("Scottish murderer"). Even better, Jennifer Lopez! And best of all - Eric Szmanda, who plays Greg Sanders in my third-favourite TV show, CSI: Las Vegas! TRULY an auspicious day.

SZMANDA!

Perhaps we should invite him to the wedding?